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Francine Caitlyn Chye
a.k.a. Hurricaine Fran
a.k.a. Fran the PCD
a.k.a. the happy bunny :D
<3
040889 (August baby!)
Crescent, ACJC, hocker
xoxo
If it's meant to be, it'll be(:
"And sometimes good things fall apart
so better things can fall together"
don't think, just run
Sunday, April 20, 2008
I went to camp, and have come back a changed (wo)man.
(Be warned, extremely personal post coming up. Pictures and more fluffy stuff soon(: )
Okay, not in completely exaggerated i-felt-the-need-to-dye-my-hair-pink or now-my-life-goal-is-to-be-a-nun kinda ways, but in the sweet, subtle, warm-and-fuzzy-feeling sorta way(:
The 3D2N camp I've just come back from was a Tertiary Students Christian camp, an association between students of Auckland Uni, Auckland Uni of Tech, MIT and Massey Uni. I went as part of AU OCF (Overseas Christian Fellowship - the group that's basically almost all Singaporeans and Malaysians, yay!) The OCF is by far the friendliest, nicest, most warm, caring and welcoming group I've been fortunate enough to be a part of. I say this with no extra suger-coated sweetness, nor any exaggeration of facts. That is the fact. From the moment I stepped in, and even as I stumbled my way through camp, I've gotten to know nothing less than the biggest hearted, most giving, fun, amazing, enthusiastic, friendly and warm people. It's not the shock as to there being such wonderful people in the world (I know many many wonderful people :D) but rather their ability to open their arms wide in acceptance of anyone who has taken the first step into joining the group, the church, the community. Immediately. No barriers, no reservations, no hesitation. It's amazing. Think back to groups you've joined in the past, be it sports groups, clubs, societies, groups of friends and i'm almost positive that there would be the slightly clique-y and hard to approach and intimidating characters. I'm sure you would have felt out of place at least once. There wasn't, and I didn't, I felt right at home.
I must confess, the one time I did go for OCF before camp, and when i decided to go for camp, my main purpose was to meet people, especially people who i knew would be in the same boat as me, or have been at least. Upon reflection, I think I had ignored the "C" in the OCF, for a number of reasons. The main one would be the seperation between how Catholic and non-Catholic churches operate, even in terms of sermons, discussions, and certain views on issues. I listened but I voluntarily chose not to let anything sink in. It's a hard thing to explain, and an even harder thing for me to admit, that us Catholics, in faulting so many non-Catholic churches as being anti-Catholic, it seems that as a Catholic, I've been just as anti, though as an anti-non-Catholic.
I'm not saying that this camp has changed my views on my faith, because it hasn't. I still very much believe in what I grew up and have grown up believing in (which I won't go into at present moment, haha). However, it has opened my heart and my mind to see that just as I'm trying to find God, so are others, however different our means may be.
It was probably halfway through camp that I realised, hey, I'm not only here for the people now, I'm here for something so much more, so much bigger. It's been a long time since I've sat down and evaluated my faith, since I've been able to start the day with praise and worship sessions, since I've been able to share about where I am in my journey with God, since I've been prayed for, since I've allowed myself to weep, since I've felt such an immense sense of peace. I suppose we never know what we need til we get it, and that I very much needed, and was lucky enough to receive.
I went to camp to fill my holidays and to meet people, but I left with so much more that I had come for. And I suppose that's evidence of how God works, in many ways, in the strangest ways, which might not make sense at the time, but always fall into place in His time. I'm really glad I went for camp(:
Am I "Really religious"? I wouldn't have said so 3 days ago, I don't even know if I would still say that now. But I do know that i'm starting to try, remembering to trust, and feeling with more than my head.
Lead me to the cross
Where Your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Lead me, lead me to the cross
ex-oh, ex-oh
4:36 PM
